A friend of mine had got back with his wife, but during there split she moved to Va. and he had got in trouble with the law, and was on probation in md but against probation officers word he went down Va. and got caught with 20thousand and some drugs. so any way he got out on bail 2-3-08 in Md. and on 3-5-08 got caught with 3pounds of marijuana coul he get out of this if he had the right lawyer and money or is his goose cooked no matter how much money he has???NO SARCASM OR JOKES ONLY PEOPLE WITH KNOWLEDGe OF THE LAW?
In my experience...Money talks.Unfortunately.NO SARCASM OR JOKES ONLY PEOPLE WITH KNOWLEDGe OF THE LAW?
With a good lawyer, very wealthy people frequently get away with things that the less well-off cannot, alas. If your friend knows of such a lawyer, who has a record of successfully defending clients who appeared to be in no-hope situations before their trials, he'd be advised to employ him or her.
Essentially, your friend committed crimes and has a prior criminal record, and should be prepared to accept the punishment for what he did. A good lawyer can make all the difference, but can often only negotiate a better deal or settlement.
Even if he had the right lawyer he would not be able to get out of this. He's had a history with drugs in the past as you've mentioned and on top of that marijuana is considered illegal (unless distributed to you by a hospital facility for medical purposes BUT even then 3 pounds of marijuana is a lot) so him having possession of something illegal is a crime itself.
I'm no lawyer but I've studied some law and dealt with courts.
From what you explain your friend is in a bunch of trouble. Specially because he was charged twice in just over a month AFTER violating his probation terms, which can only play against this persons case. Secondly was the amount of drugs he possessed. 3 pounds of marijuana can be possession with the intent to sell.
Unless he gets a genius lawyer your friend is in a world of trouble.
He could be charged with 4 to 5 different charges.
That is a probation vilolation and another charge with drugs, he will probably do time of whatever he was on probation for at the least unless he has the dream team working for him.
the only one not going to jail is his lawyer. your pal needs a sign around his neck saying';stoopid'; sorry.
On probation; caught with 20K %26amp; drugs; while on bail caught with 3 lb grass.
Jail time. Period
Instead of worrying about what will happen to him, you need to find a better group of friends.
Friday, October 22, 2010
How do i regain my wifes trust, at least some of it?
Over the course of 3 years I have done some really stupid things that has totally ruined the trust that my wife had in me. She never really fully trusted me in what I had to say or anything I did from day one. She had good reason and I wanted more than anything for her to trust me. I had treated her really bad the first 2 years we dated and she kept her distance then my world totally fell apart and I needed someone and she was there for me and helped me get through a tuff time and get back on my feet. And to be honest I kept crapping on her, she just kept plugging away about getting her life together and takeing care of her 4 kids and my 5kids. She kept telling me that she did not have time for my bull and as soon as my 3 boys were big enough to fend for theirselves she was gone. So when the 2 oldest got out of the house and the 3rd one started his Senior year and moved in with his girlfriend, she did just that, she moved 200 miles away from me. I missed her something horrible and promised to change and do better if she would just come home and marry me. She refused to give her home, job and new life up for me but agreed to give me another chance, but at a long distance relationship. I wanted her back so I agreed. The woman stayed on my back even harder because we were so far apart. After awhile I promised her that is she would just marry me I would make things work by comeing to live with her in her new home and find work there. She agreed and we talked about it and then made plans to get married. I even screwed that up, we were supposed to go to KY get married and spend a romantic weekend away alone. well to start off with I was 6 hours late to get married, I showed up in dirty clothes and smelled of alcohol and marijuana, but she still married me, chalked it up to me being scared. Then when I said i didn't have a ring for her but she had one for me, she still went through with it and said ';I DO';, then as we left to drive to our weekend get-away that she so thoughtfully planned and reserved, I decided to go back to my home instead and we sat on the couch and watched TV and I got drunk. I stayed that way and she left and went back home. I disappointed my wife but she stuck by me. Then I got into trouble agin and ended up on house arrest for the entire summer, 3 long months so I could not go see her, she would come down once a week, do my errands (store, laundry, bank, bills, post office) not speak and go home. By this time I had gotten so depressed that i had 3 affairs on her between May and August, when I got off house arrest, she gave me divorce papers. I asked ';why now?'; And she told me that she didn't want to make my situation any worse but she was done and to please just take the divorce papers to my attorney, go over them and sign them. She asked me for nothing but a signature and her name back. Well of course I refused to let go that easy, so I started going up to spend every weekend with her and then meet her in the middle every tuesday just trying to fix thing. She didn't really want me in her home on a full time basis. She spent time with me and started to forgive me and let me into her life under her conditions and I agreed. well the day before thanksgiving i screwed up again and got into trouble and this time I lost my job. So now I am with her full-time, there is no excuse not to be. She chewed on me very hard for a week and is angry with me. She says everytime I get into trouble i run and hide behind her and she is right. Otherwise I dont want to be here. She wont hear me out on anything, she just says dont talk to me and then you wont lie to me anymore. She lets me stay, cooks for me and takes care of me, but we dont talk and dont communicate. She works nites 4 days a week. When she is home at nite she sleeps on the couch away from me and this just smothers me, I lay awake and watch her sleep. If she falls asleep on her bed and i lay down she gets up to leave. She wont confide in me and just tells me that she is doing what is right until I can take care of myself agin. Our 1st wedding anniversary was on Dec 7th. She never even acknowledged it. I reminded her about 9pm that nite by telling her what day it was and that it was our anniversary and she just said ';I Know'; and kept watching TV. She has never cheated on me or done me wrong in any manner. She is good to me and the list of things I have done to her is so long and so wrong I cant take them back.
I want my wife to love me and trust me. I want to keep her and have a family and a home. She has so much to offer and a good heart. But I dont know where or how to start. I cant make her forget all I have done but I wish I could get her to see how I will do better and make a difference.How do i regain my wifes trust, at least some of it?
Have you ever looked in a mirror and seen your potential? Your wife has obviously seen things in you that you do not. No woman would stay with you behaving the way you did, unless she seen human compassion, true talent, and a heart worth its weight in the pain you have caused her. With the amount of time she has loved you, I would say yes you have a chance. But you must stop the petty poor me behavior. You messed up but you are redeemable. Get a job, clean up around the house. Do nice things for her (make a bath for her with candles, cook dinner, clean the one part of the house that she hates) show that you are worthy and sorry. Tell her you love her every day, even if she doesnt respond she will know. Know that she will never forget what you have done but they will fade to a distant memory. When you leave the house leave notes, call when you get there and when you are on your way home. Do for her what she has done for you, love her and support her, and do not give up if you truly love her. You can do it, just stop saying what is it you should do and use her as your role model.How do i regain my wifes trust, at least some of it?
Are you for real? You are lucky she gave you more than one chance. There is no way I would have married you second time around with you showing up late, etc etc. Give her up man and let her enjoy life with someone who will appreciate her, even being by herself is better than being with you.
Honesty + Consistency = Trust
You are going to have to do what you say you will do for a long while before you are going to get the results you want. With a track record like you described it is going to take time and energy for her to believe you again. Blessings and long on your journey. She sounds like she is certainly worth it!!!!
So, be lovable and trustworthy. Quit being a nightmare of a leech. Sounds like you could use AA, where you might learn how to be the man she deserves. But something tells me this is all feel sorry for myself talk. Why change? She takes care of you, right?
You say she has so much to offer but what have you offered her? What are willing to do for her? She took care of your kids while you had fun. It sounds like she's done but the only way you are going to make it work if there is a remote chance is by praying and getting your life together.
I've seen the Lord do miracles in many, many marriages before. You never know. Besides, what do you have to lose now?
Your are a complete loser, and she must be an idiot with a big heart.
Only in Kentucky.
Ahh.... you're wife's so sweet:) I think you should do something that she will really love. ya know like take her out 2 dinner or buy her something special. She'll probably love you again
Wow, you are one lucky dog man. I don't really understand you.
I also don't understand why she's putting up with you on her couch.
Since you didn't get her a present for your anniversary I think it's over.
You need to get a job and get out, basically. Once you have something to offer her, you should call her. She clearly loves you.
Ya know???
I read this, and I'd have walked away from you years ago, hon....kids or no kids...... Marriage is Admiration Respect Passion and Trust. There is nothing you are that is admirable, anything to respect or have passion for, and you have already admitted the trust is gone.... Hon, when the trust is gone, by all the crap that you pulled, the rest of it is in the toilet. You don't have a marriage, hon....
And unless she is willing to get into therapy to correct all this (unlikely) you stay under her terms.
well its going to be hard, your going to have to completely create a new history for yourself. get a good job, and tell her about that. maybe just start by calling her every once in a while, and telling her about all the things you are willing to do to make a difference. its going to take a while but im sure you can do it.
You don't deserve her, the fact that she has taken you back so many times and that you are in her house is mind blowing!! There is no way to win someone's trust back after all that you have done. If you TRUELY love her...let her go, get out of her life and don't allow her to waste even one more minute taking care of you or doing anything for you. Give her her life back, you can't give her back all the years you have taken from her but you can let her start living her life for her instead of waiting until the next time you do her wrong AGAIN, and you will you know it and I know it
wow.... uhhh.. well.... first off.... you suck
and kudos to her for staying with a loser..... if my husband ever even THOUGHT of doing half the crap you did he would have his *** handed to him, and would be denied of even acknowledging that he knew me....
it doesn't even sound like you are trying... not one bit... it honestly sounds like a bunch of whining about how bad your life is.. or wait how bad you've made her life... and how you refuse to change it....
i think at this point you should take a broom and sweep up whatever dignity you have left and ruin someone else's life and leave her to be happy with someone else that will appreciate her and treat her the way that she deserves to be treated....
maybe you should fix your problems so that you can have something to offer her.... besides more for her to clean up
wow. you are on peice of crap husband but for some odd reason she sees something in you and obviously loves you like no other. you should be thanking your stars shes still around to save your a** every time you screw up cuz i guarantee after a while i would have left you to figure it out yourself. whats wrong with you??! why on earth would you do these things to a woman who is like...the best women ever i swear? you really dont deserve her. you should get a job and get out and let her be. i really think that if you do love her...you should let her move on and be with a guy who would treat her like a princess. she DEFINATELY deserves it. i know your in pain...but sayin is...if you love something let it go. LET HER MOVE ON and quit ruining her life. you need to work on yourself. then maybe when your done bettering yourself maybe just then shell still be around for you...
I want my wife to love me and trust me. I want to keep her and have a family and a home. She has so much to offer and a good heart. But I dont know where or how to start. I cant make her forget all I have done but I wish I could get her to see how I will do better and make a difference.How do i regain my wifes trust, at least some of it?
Have you ever looked in a mirror and seen your potential? Your wife has obviously seen things in you that you do not. No woman would stay with you behaving the way you did, unless she seen human compassion, true talent, and a heart worth its weight in the pain you have caused her. With the amount of time she has loved you, I would say yes you have a chance. But you must stop the petty poor me behavior. You messed up but you are redeemable. Get a job, clean up around the house. Do nice things for her (make a bath for her with candles, cook dinner, clean the one part of the house that she hates) show that you are worthy and sorry. Tell her you love her every day, even if she doesnt respond she will know. Know that she will never forget what you have done but they will fade to a distant memory. When you leave the house leave notes, call when you get there and when you are on your way home. Do for her what she has done for you, love her and support her, and do not give up if you truly love her. You can do it, just stop saying what is it you should do and use her as your role model.How do i regain my wifes trust, at least some of it?
Are you for real? You are lucky she gave you more than one chance. There is no way I would have married you second time around with you showing up late, etc etc. Give her up man and let her enjoy life with someone who will appreciate her, even being by herself is better than being with you.
Honesty + Consistency = Trust
You are going to have to do what you say you will do for a long while before you are going to get the results you want. With a track record like you described it is going to take time and energy for her to believe you again. Blessings and long on your journey. She sounds like she is certainly worth it!!!!
So, be lovable and trustworthy. Quit being a nightmare of a leech. Sounds like you could use AA, where you might learn how to be the man she deserves. But something tells me this is all feel sorry for myself talk. Why change? She takes care of you, right?
You say she has so much to offer but what have you offered her? What are willing to do for her? She took care of your kids while you had fun. It sounds like she's done but the only way you are going to make it work if there is a remote chance is by praying and getting your life together.
I've seen the Lord do miracles in many, many marriages before. You never know. Besides, what do you have to lose now?
Your are a complete loser, and she must be an idiot with a big heart.
Only in Kentucky.
Ahh.... you're wife's so sweet:) I think you should do something that she will really love. ya know like take her out 2 dinner or buy her something special. She'll probably love you again
Wow, you are one lucky dog man. I don't really understand you.
I also don't understand why she's putting up with you on her couch.
Since you didn't get her a present for your anniversary I think it's over.
You need to get a job and get out, basically. Once you have something to offer her, you should call her. She clearly loves you.
Ya know???
I read this, and I'd have walked away from you years ago, hon....kids or no kids...... Marriage is Admiration Respect Passion and Trust. There is nothing you are that is admirable, anything to respect or have passion for, and you have already admitted the trust is gone.... Hon, when the trust is gone, by all the crap that you pulled, the rest of it is in the toilet. You don't have a marriage, hon....
And unless she is willing to get into therapy to correct all this (unlikely) you stay under her terms.
well its going to be hard, your going to have to completely create a new history for yourself. get a good job, and tell her about that. maybe just start by calling her every once in a while, and telling her about all the things you are willing to do to make a difference. its going to take a while but im sure you can do it.
You don't deserve her, the fact that she has taken you back so many times and that you are in her house is mind blowing!! There is no way to win someone's trust back after all that you have done. If you TRUELY love her...let her go, get out of her life and don't allow her to waste even one more minute taking care of you or doing anything for you. Give her her life back, you can't give her back all the years you have taken from her but you can let her start living her life for her instead of waiting until the next time you do her wrong AGAIN, and you will you know it and I know it
wow.... uhhh.. well.... first off.... you suck
and kudos to her for staying with a loser..... if my husband ever even THOUGHT of doing half the crap you did he would have his *** handed to him, and would be denied of even acknowledging that he knew me....
it doesn't even sound like you are trying... not one bit... it honestly sounds like a bunch of whining about how bad your life is.. or wait how bad you've made her life... and how you refuse to change it....
i think at this point you should take a broom and sweep up whatever dignity you have left and ruin someone else's life and leave her to be happy with someone else that will appreciate her and treat her the way that she deserves to be treated....
maybe you should fix your problems so that you can have something to offer her.... besides more for her to clean up
wow. you are on peice of crap husband but for some odd reason she sees something in you and obviously loves you like no other. you should be thanking your stars shes still around to save your a** every time you screw up cuz i guarantee after a while i would have left you to figure it out yourself. whats wrong with you??! why on earth would you do these things to a woman who is like...the best women ever i swear? you really dont deserve her. you should get a job and get out and let her be. i really think that if you do love her...you should let her move on and be with a guy who would treat her like a princess. she DEFINATELY deserves it. i know your in pain...but sayin is...if you love something let it go. LET HER MOVE ON and quit ruining her life. you need to work on yourself. then maybe when your done bettering yourself maybe just then shell still be around for you...
Trouble with interfering MIL?
I have spoken to my husband on multiple occasions about his mother overstepping her boundaries. I don't allow her to visit often and rarely go to my in-laws house (though I love my FIL). However, since becoming pregnant, she has pushed her way into our daily routines, dropping by just as I'm putting my daughter down for a nap, which gets her hyper and disrupts her night time sleeping patterns. Normally, I would go by the adage of not everyone gets along with their MIL. My problems are more deep-rooted. When I first started dating my husband, I let his mother watch my daughter while we went on a date. When I picked her up, she smelled like marijuana. When I asked MIL about it, she said she did it outside while the baby was asleep, as if that is excusable. My husband was raised by his grandmother because of his mother's drug abuse. On our wedding day, she walked around complaining that she might as well die because nobody was paying any attention to her. Every six months or so, she has some new, incurable disease. Last Thanksgiving it was a hole in her heart, and at Easter is was an inoperable brain tumor. My husband's siblings are now turning attention to me because I will have the newest addition next April, which roughly coincides with MIL's next ailment. This woman is driving me out of my mind. My husband has spoken to her, but she says it is her right to be a part of my entire pregnancy as it is HER grandchild.
With Thanksgiving coming up, how do I handle her?It is unavoidable as we spend Thanksgiving with my husband's side of the family and Christmas with mine. Any ideas on how to cope through 15 hours of this lady? (I do most of the cooking, so I have to be there.) I don't want to be arrested for manslaughter at 19w pregnant.Trouble with interfering MIL?
LOL!!! I don't think we want you arrested for manslaughter at 19 wks pregnant. My dad was similar to your MIL when I got pregnant with my first. He's a good guy, but he has a mental illness where he constantly believes he is sick and dying. I was/am a teen mom, so when I told them I was pregnant, instead of trying to help me move in the right direction he talked about how I had screwed HIS life over. lol. I heard about that for 38 wks! When I moved in with my fiance he would come by our house to ';check on us.'; Then he would talk about what a terrible head ache he had, how his back hurt, and how he just wanted to take a nap, and he would fall asleep on my couch. I found there was really nothing I could do, so I moved to Alaska, and because he's too cheap to pay to see us he leaves us alone.
Don't kill your MIL. lol. It might ruin your relationship with your FIL.
Best of luck!!!Trouble with interfering MIL?
im sorry, i deal with a FIL who i cannot stand...it sucks being stuck where you cannot really say anything...but even when your husband does it helps ZERO.
i would say get tipsy beforehand...but yea, you dont need to do that. idk how to tell you to deal with it cause everyone has different personalities and takes ';news'; of being annoying different. so what may ';work'; (yea right, nothing works) with my FIL probably wont with her. and honestly, i dont think it ever stops unless you finally lash out and let everything you have always wanted to say be said...but that may start a big family feud, and is not worth it. sorry, but maybe just avoid HER even though you cannot avoid being in the same house.
I have two drama queens in my family that do the same thing, my mom and her mother, So I know it is hard to deal with but hang in there. You can't kill her and you can't make her vanish so just try your hardest to keep her at a distance because smoking pot while watching your daughter is a huge red flag. My advice to you is tell her to stay away from you because she is causing you alot of stress that you and the baby don't need then explain that to your husband. Good Luck.
With Thanksgiving coming up, how do I handle her?It is unavoidable as we spend Thanksgiving with my husband's side of the family and Christmas with mine. Any ideas on how to cope through 15 hours of this lady? (I do most of the cooking, so I have to be there.) I don't want to be arrested for manslaughter at 19w pregnant.Trouble with interfering MIL?
LOL!!! I don't think we want you arrested for manslaughter at 19 wks pregnant. My dad was similar to your MIL when I got pregnant with my first. He's a good guy, but he has a mental illness where he constantly believes he is sick and dying. I was/am a teen mom, so when I told them I was pregnant, instead of trying to help me move in the right direction he talked about how I had screwed HIS life over. lol. I heard about that for 38 wks! When I moved in with my fiance he would come by our house to ';check on us.'; Then he would talk about what a terrible head ache he had, how his back hurt, and how he just wanted to take a nap, and he would fall asleep on my couch. I found there was really nothing I could do, so I moved to Alaska, and because he's too cheap to pay to see us he leaves us alone.
Don't kill your MIL. lol. It might ruin your relationship with your FIL.
Best of luck!!!Trouble with interfering MIL?
im sorry, i deal with a FIL who i cannot stand...it sucks being stuck where you cannot really say anything...but even when your husband does it helps ZERO.
i would say get tipsy beforehand...but yea, you dont need to do that. idk how to tell you to deal with it cause everyone has different personalities and takes ';news'; of being annoying different. so what may ';work'; (yea right, nothing works) with my FIL probably wont with her. and honestly, i dont think it ever stops unless you finally lash out and let everything you have always wanted to say be said...but that may start a big family feud, and is not worth it. sorry, but maybe just avoid HER even though you cannot avoid being in the same house.
I have two drama queens in my family that do the same thing, my mom and her mother, So I know it is hard to deal with but hang in there. You can't kill her and you can't make her vanish so just try your hardest to keep her at a distance because smoking pot while watching your daughter is a huge red flag. My advice to you is tell her to stay away from you because she is causing you alot of stress that you and the baby don't need then explain that to your husband. Good Luck.
Bad depression problem need some advice?
This probably isnt the best place to ask for help on my dillemma but i have no one else who understands me.Here we go..Im 20 years old and at the moment trying my hardest to get back on my feet financially due to being unemployed for a while and my last two jobs had terrible bosses so i left all my life ive suffered financial disadvantage which has left me in bad/complicted situations i don't even have a drivers license yet nor a learners permit because i still havent been able to afford it.Im at the moment studying (doing a course) which is 4 days a week and am on centrelink (government payments) for studying and they paid for my course.Im struggling to afford train fairs because i dont get enough because i pay board money i live out of home.So ive had to do only 4 days a week studying.There are days ive had off of school due to no money and i lie to the course co-ordinater and say i can't make it because im ill.I have been in and out of home since i was 14 years old due to my stepfather being abusive towards me and my mother ( she is still with him).I only recently moved out of home again because of his interference with my personal relationships asking questions about my sex life and the erotic modelling i used to do at a time of desperation (payment).I can't live under the same roof as him because of the snicky nosing and him being very greedy.He claims everything in the house including my mums money is only his.And during the years when major arguments have happened he has broken belongings of mine (that ive bought myself) or my mums.And recently he smashed my computer up so i now use my friends and on that night took all of mums money for himself before leaving.Whatever foods he wants for dinner mum cooks it to avoid arguments and him going wacko,at times we'd eat the same thing (mum and i) to save her cooking different meals each night.When i was living at home mum told me not to have any conversations with him because he tries to turn it into an argument he thrives on them.And that he didnt like to be left out.I never invited friends around because i was embarressed because he big notes himself and tries to impress.He hasn't many himself because he's not very liked by people.The only ones he has are marijuana smokers like himself.I know the truth is my mum will never leave him and it hurts alot.And that i couldn't live back at home again because of the way he is in alot of aspects including the safety of my privacy and belongings (he talks about my personal business to his friends).Lately i have been boiling my eyes out like crazy and just can't stop.Im also more or less having suicidal thoughts!!I think about how nice it would be being away from my family and no more pain and sadness.I have been really trying to keep my chin up but failing to do so.I don't want to have these horrible thoughts anymore and want to move on.But can't.My life is just dull and ive had a bad run of luck in it and money has contributed to most of my problems.Without seeing a counseller because i can't afford and im too embarressed to discuss all of this in person what can i do to improve the way i feel????Bad depression problem need some advice?
We need to focus on you, not the past. I would like to help. I can relate to your situation and would like to offer sugestions. Would you consider e-mailing me?Bad depression problem need some advice?
It is not unusual to have serious depression after being physically and emotionally abused. You really need therapy and a psychiatrist to be able to live again because right now, you are not. None of this is your fault even if you wanted sex, or used it to get in his good graces. It takes a long while to recover what you have been through. There are ways to get free help. Call the sexual abuse hot-line and they may be able to help. You can have a life that is without this living hell. I have done it. It has taken many years of therapy. Not only do you have depression,you have post traumatic stress disorder. You did not deserve to experience this. I am so very sorry that you went through such a devastating traumatic life. Stay away from your mother right now. She has betrayed you and does not even know it. Do not be around this man at any time. You can do this and get your rightful life back. If you have suicidal thoughts go to the ER and have yourself admitted to the hospital. They can help you immensely
Sounds to me like you could find alot of joy visiting a local church or temple or such. Even for a service just to start. I am not the church lady type. To all the naysayers reading this. But years ago, this helped me.
1. Forgiveness is the first and hardest step (trust me it's very hard) especially in situiation you are in .
2. Get religeon you don't know how much this help I recommend Christianity, Judaism, or Islam but any is good.
3. Stay at a friends house or a cousin or if you still have grandparents ( im sorry if you dont)
4. Get a job and even though it might not work but try selling things on ebay.
5. Get someone to talk to.
IF you are a Christian, Jewish, or Muslim you will get what you deserve in Judgement Day
I recommend you check out this social networking community called LetsReflect.com. There are people there going through situations similar to yours. They are great for advice and encouragement.
The process of “Self Reflection” has truly changed my life….here’s my profile. http://www.letsreflect.com/profile.php?u…
This is a journey….not a quick fix. The trick is staying positive and surrounding yourself with positive people. You are capable of great things! I believe in you. Best of luck.
Consuming the right food is vital for your health. You can try supplementing your diet with acai berry, it is not only a widely tested and acknowledged weight loss produce, it is a superfood too. There is a risk free trial offered at http://rikump.fatfreestore.info I have been using it for 2 weeks now and it's certainly having an effect!!
Consider volunteering, even from home, at first, as shown in page B, which will act as occupational therapy, help boost self esteem, keep activity out of undesirable parts of the brain, help others, and provide you with something to tell prospective employers about your activities since becoming unemployed.
Don't be too picky about the type of job; employers prefer someone already employed (or volunteering). Approach local businesses, restaurants, fast food places, hotels/motels, supermarkets, gas/petrol stations, etc. and leave your contact details, even if just jotted down on a piece of cardboard. Such places are always hiring. Keep in mind that the economy is in the process of turning around, at present, and employers will soon be hiring again in larger numbers, but at present, there can be many applications for any given vacancy. Remain resolutely optimistic, and maintain a positive mental attitude. Use the TECHNIQUE FOR COMBATING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS, on page B, as necessary. A useful counterthought is: ';Things will get better soon';. Or make up your own. Repeat if necessary. Contact your county/local mental health agency, to see what help they can provide. Sliding scale based psychological counselling is often available from Catholic counselling, the Methodist church, or Unitarian Universalists, and sometimes the United Way. You don't have to be a member. Google: ';clinics; mhmr; (your location)'; %26amp; ';free clinics; (your location)'; Also contact your local department of human services and apply for state health care. See http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/21/health… Talk with a social worker, via your local free clinic, (Google: ';free clinic; [your location] ) or public hospital. Local is best, or (202) 408 8600. They often have useful advice, and contacts. Have a list of questions prepared, and jot down answers. Food stamps: http://www.fns.usda.gov/fsp Phone: 1800 221 5689. Check out http://www.socialsecurity.gov Dept. of Children and Families. Enquire about Medicaid Insurance. Other advice that I am aware of is to contact your local social services department and apply for state medicaid, then find a doctor who accepts it. See http://www.walmart.com/catalog/catalog.g… for generic mental health medication, at $4/month's supply, or $10/90 days; (more in CA., and 8 other US states) also try calling Target pharmaceuticals. View www.pparx.org/ and call 1-888-4PP-ANOW (1-888-477-2669), if financially disadvantaged in the USA, and seeking a bipolar medication subsidy. Also see www.needymeds.com/ %26amp; www.low-cost-rx.com/ Some pharmaceutical companies will provide medications free, or at reduced cost, depending on the circumstances of the applicant; qualification guidelines vary.
We need to focus on you, not the past. I would like to help. I can relate to your situation and would like to offer sugestions. Would you consider e-mailing me?Bad depression problem need some advice?
It is not unusual to have serious depression after being physically and emotionally abused. You really need therapy and a psychiatrist to be able to live again because right now, you are not. None of this is your fault even if you wanted sex, or used it to get in his good graces. It takes a long while to recover what you have been through. There are ways to get free help. Call the sexual abuse hot-line and they may be able to help. You can have a life that is without this living hell. I have done it. It has taken many years of therapy. Not only do you have depression,you have post traumatic stress disorder. You did not deserve to experience this. I am so very sorry that you went through such a devastating traumatic life. Stay away from your mother right now. She has betrayed you and does not even know it. Do not be around this man at any time. You can do this and get your rightful life back. If you have suicidal thoughts go to the ER and have yourself admitted to the hospital. They can help you immensely
Sounds to me like you could find alot of joy visiting a local church or temple or such. Even for a service just to start. I am not the church lady type. To all the naysayers reading this. But years ago, this helped me.
1. Forgiveness is the first and hardest step (trust me it's very hard) especially in situiation you are in .
2. Get religeon you don't know how much this help I recommend Christianity, Judaism, or Islam but any is good.
3. Stay at a friends house or a cousin or if you still have grandparents ( im sorry if you dont)
4. Get a job and even though it might not work but try selling things on ebay.
5. Get someone to talk to.
IF you are a Christian, Jewish, or Muslim you will get what you deserve in Judgement Day
I recommend you check out this social networking community called LetsReflect.com. There are people there going through situations similar to yours. They are great for advice and encouragement.
The process of “Self Reflection” has truly changed my life….here’s my profile. http://www.letsreflect.com/profile.php?u…
This is a journey….not a quick fix. The trick is staying positive and surrounding yourself with positive people. You are capable of great things! I believe in you. Best of luck.
Consuming the right food is vital for your health. You can try supplementing your diet with acai berry, it is not only a widely tested and acknowledged weight loss produce, it is a superfood too. There is a risk free trial offered at http://rikump.fatfreestore.info I have been using it for 2 weeks now and it's certainly having an effect!!
Consider volunteering, even from home, at first, as shown in page B, which will act as occupational therapy, help boost self esteem, keep activity out of undesirable parts of the brain, help others, and provide you with something to tell prospective employers about your activities since becoming unemployed.
Don't be too picky about the type of job; employers prefer someone already employed (or volunteering). Approach local businesses, restaurants, fast food places, hotels/motels, supermarkets, gas/petrol stations, etc. and leave your contact details, even if just jotted down on a piece of cardboard. Such places are always hiring. Keep in mind that the economy is in the process of turning around, at present, and employers will soon be hiring again in larger numbers, but at present, there can be many applications for any given vacancy. Remain resolutely optimistic, and maintain a positive mental attitude. Use the TECHNIQUE FOR COMBATING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS, on page B, as necessary. A useful counterthought is: ';Things will get better soon';. Or make up your own. Repeat if necessary. Contact your county/local mental health agency, to see what help they can provide. Sliding scale based psychological counselling is often available from Catholic counselling, the Methodist church, or Unitarian Universalists, and sometimes the United Way. You don't have to be a member. Google: ';clinics; mhmr; (your location)'; %26amp; ';free clinics; (your location)'; Also contact your local department of human services and apply for state health care. See http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/21/health… Talk with a social worker, via your local free clinic, (Google: ';free clinic; [your location] ) or public hospital. Local is best, or (202) 408 8600. They often have useful advice, and contacts. Have a list of questions prepared, and jot down answers. Food stamps: http://www.fns.usda.gov/fsp Phone: 1800 221 5689. Check out http://www.socialsecurity.gov Dept. of Children and Families. Enquire about Medicaid Insurance. Other advice that I am aware of is to contact your local social services department and apply for state medicaid, then find a doctor who accepts it. See http://www.walmart.com/catalog/catalog.g… for generic mental health medication, at $4/month's supply, or $10/90 days; (more in CA., and 8 other US states) also try calling Target pharmaceuticals. View www.pparx.org/ and call 1-888-4PP-ANOW (1-888-477-2669), if financially disadvantaged in the USA, and seeking a bipolar medication subsidy. Also see www.needymeds.com/ %26amp; www.low-cost-rx.com/ Some pharmaceutical companies will provide medications free, or at reduced cost, depending on the circumstances of the applicant; qualification guidelines vary.
I am sure a lot of people are gonna give me grief, but I need advice?Probably Very long...?
My husband and I have been married 3 1/2 years. We've been together for 6 1/2. We have a 2 1/2 year old daughter. That said, here are my problems:
I bought a car right after having my daughter. It was a loan of $13000. I had a 700 credit score at the time. I had never bought a car before and had no clue what I was doing and ended up not getting a warranty. During the time I had the car (9months) it broke down numerous times and I spent over $2700 in repairs. That being said, I could not make the payments and I asked them to pick up the car. They repo'd because I asked them to. The then sold the car for only $1000. Now they want $12000 paid to them. I have no money in savings. I have no money period.
When my daighter was 3 months old, I was laid off from my job. Work was very slow and they could not afford to pay me anymore. I took a big hit and couldn't find work for 3 months. When I finally found work it was $9 an hour and barely enough to make ends meet.
I worked there for 9 months and then my husband found the same fate as me and was laid off. He could not find work again for 8 months. When he finally found a job it was 50 miles away and he worked there for 6 months before they had to let him go becuase their company was failing with the economy and they lost a big client.
When I wass laid off, I needed money and I stupidly went to Cash Call. They gave me a $2500 loan and 59% interest which I didn't find out about until they mailed the paperwork. Everything had been done over the phone. I paid payments for over a year and a half and the payoff was still well over $3000 due to the interest. I finally made a big payment of $2000 but they still say I owe them $1700. I recently stopped paying them. I couldn't handle it anymore.
So now I am way over my head in debt. I have a 520 on my credit, and my husband is 560. We are trying to keep food on the table. my husband is still unemployed and on his second extension.
He has always been a smoker, and now he has picked up drinking. He isn't a drunk, by all means, but he has probably 2 24oz. beers a day. We don't have the money for him to be out spending $4-6 a day. That adds up to $120-160 a month! He also has ADHD and has a medical prescription for marijuana. He doesn't smoke around us but it is legal and prescribed to him. My biggest problem is that he spends about $60 a week on his prescription.
We are badly in debt, and he won't stop drinking or smoking and doesn't understand the amount he spends.
NOW: He is a great dad and husband other than those things. He cooks, cleans, watches the little one EVERYDAY because we cannot afford daycare. He cooks for her, gives her baths, has always changed diapers. He will have dinner ready when I get home and the house will be spotless. He works hard around the yard. He will even do anything I ask of him. If I want a snack from the kitchen, if I want a bath, he will run it. I can tell he really loves both of us and I feel like a bad person sometimes because I want to leave because of the money spending.
How can I deal with this all? What would you do? Maybe this is a plea for help. I love him, but I want him to stop drinking every night. I want him to stop with the cigarettes. He tells me: ';I don't tell you what to do!'; But I don't ever do anything. I don't get my hair done or nails done. I don't spend on anything extra. We don't have Satellite or cable. I don't even go clothes shopping. I own 3 pairs of pants, one pair 2 sizes too big. I can''t even remember the last time I bought anything for myself.
Any questions?
What should I do?I am sure a lot of people are gonna give me grief, but I need advice?Probably Very long...?
Perhaps it's time to file bankruptcy. It can't possibly do any more to your credit, it already sucks big time! Find the money for an initial consult with a lawyer, your hubby can skip his dope for a week to cover it.I am sure a lot of people are gonna give me grief, but I need advice?Probably Very long...?
wow! I don't have a solution and I don't know your beliefs, but I wanted to tell you that you will be in my prayers for sure...Good luck to you
i don't like this but your situation calls for it. file for Bankruptcy now!!!
you need a clean start. you also need to talk to your husband about his drinking and pot smoking. it is something that you guys can not afford.
good luck.
I'm gonna pray for you
You shouldn't let him go over some habits you don't like, smoking is addictive, hence- he can't just stop cold turkey and expect him to oblige in not spending. The drinking is also addictive no matter if he doesn't get very drunk.
Other than his bad habits, he seems like a great hard working and loving husband, those things should definitely overshadow his flaws, because they are more important to keep in your life. You need to just talk to him, in a loving and concerning way, tell him how you feel and how him spending worries you and makes you anxious. Talk it over and I am sure you both can come up with a solution or way to work up to a solution, don't just abondaned him over you own money anxities that don't necessarly completely involve him. Hope it works out.
Put him on a budget. Give him money for the week and let him know once it's gone, that's it. Do the same for yourself. Bills aside, you should still enjoy life. That's why you're feeling so bitter. It's because you feel like your working your butt off but with nothing but more bills to show for it. The bills will always be there. Learn how to get them paid and still have something for yourself. By no means do I mean, have a spa weekend every weekend, but doing nice things for yourself every once in a while is a must.
Also, let him know you understand he might be a bit frustrated by his current position but you're behind him and it will get better. Things will look up eventually...you just gotta hang in there.
Declare bankruptcy. It will mean you can't buy anything in credit for 5 years or so, however it will get you out of this pickle. You and your husband both need to find decent reliable well paying jobs, and start again. You will get through it
Good news! 59% is illegal because it is considered usuary!!
In most states, you don't only get the interest back you paid but sometimes you get 3x the amount they loaned you.
if you are sure you cannot get out from under one thing you can do is file bankruptcy - you can do this yourself by getting the paperwork -
the caution I have for you is that once you do it - your credit is shot for 5 to 7 years -
the good news is that all your debts go away
tough choice -
if you decide to go that route - go out and borrow all the cash you can and buy everything you can on credit BEFORE you file -
and include those debts on the filing
now that doesn't solve the problem of your husband drinking and smoking - but it solves a ';short'; term problem
as far as he's concerned - he has to be able to see the problem himself before he'll help - if doesn't he never will and you will forever have problems -
Stop paying all credit cards and loans. File for bankruptcy.
The husband smokes, you know it, let him do it. As for the beer, 2 a day is too much, talk to him and make a deal for 1 a day or 2 every other day. He's under a lot of stress too. You love him, he's good to you and all of this stress in making you not look at the big picture. Your credit score is just a number, it's not happiness. Who cares about the credit score if you're happy. Go get your nails done and stop feeling guilty. Good luck.
Don't file bankruptcy. You won't be starting a CLEAN slate. Your credit will look WORSE then it does now.
Look for a debt consolidation company OR learn to communicate with your husband about pinching pennies and working your way out of debt.
On a side note i think you two need marriage counseling.
Good luck. Work hard and stick to it.
I hate to say it, but bankruptcy sounds like a good option. You need to get him on a budget pronto!
Bankruptcy.
While it's true you are an adult etc... etc... the people who make loans are responsible for enforcing terms.
It is THEIR FAULT they loaned money to someone that cannot pay it back and a 59% interest is considered predatory and illegal in I believe 49 of the 50 states - all except Nevada. If you have paperwork about this, take it to your lawyer. They'll see settlement $$$ and might take the case on payment for pending successful outcome. They'll get all almost the money but you'll get it taken care of.
Get help getting the bankruptcy over with and give-up on your credit score and live on cash for the next seven years.
Don't give anyone a dime you don't want to; your money is yours.
They took the gamble when they made you the loan.
Loans and credit are NOT ';real money'; they are NOT cash.
They are fake, false, make-believe things those companies /invented/ to make money.
Do not harbor any guilt not paying them back. The deal is you pay it back for a good credit-score or don't for a bad one and that's IT.
You are better off ';off the grid'; anyway. It will force you to live within your means.
your life sounds very stressful, and your hubby may need cigs and beer to cope with the stress. some people cant cope well with stress; you can look down on him for that but you cant do anything about it. in fact, cigs are addictive so he cant simply give it up. it takes a lot of work to over come addictions. But, here's what you can do about it. Give yourself $20 a week to spend on yourself. You already cant pay your bills and will have to file bankrupt. Spending $80 a month isnt going to put you more in debt than you already are, and honestly its a bad idea to completely deprive yourself of everything. Depression isnt going to help your money probs, so use your $80 toward things that make you happy. Take your kid to the zoo, go see a movie with a friend, buy yourself a pair of $15 jeans from walmart, etc.
bankruptcy file around income tax time and do not give up on each other in good times and in bad times stay together no matter what and look for government assistance I don't know how you will get him to stop smoking the pot the more you nag the worse it will be I always go to garage sales or thrift stores and alot of churches give away free stuff look for food pantry's keep your chin up and pray for strength
I bought a car right after having my daughter. It was a loan of $13000. I had a 700 credit score at the time. I had never bought a car before and had no clue what I was doing and ended up not getting a warranty. During the time I had the car (9months) it broke down numerous times and I spent over $2700 in repairs. That being said, I could not make the payments and I asked them to pick up the car. They repo'd because I asked them to. The then sold the car for only $1000. Now they want $12000 paid to them. I have no money in savings. I have no money period.
When my daighter was 3 months old, I was laid off from my job. Work was very slow and they could not afford to pay me anymore. I took a big hit and couldn't find work for 3 months. When I finally found work it was $9 an hour and barely enough to make ends meet.
I worked there for 9 months and then my husband found the same fate as me and was laid off. He could not find work again for 8 months. When he finally found a job it was 50 miles away and he worked there for 6 months before they had to let him go becuase their company was failing with the economy and they lost a big client.
When I wass laid off, I needed money and I stupidly went to Cash Call. They gave me a $2500 loan and 59% interest which I didn't find out about until they mailed the paperwork. Everything had been done over the phone. I paid payments for over a year and a half and the payoff was still well over $3000 due to the interest. I finally made a big payment of $2000 but they still say I owe them $1700. I recently stopped paying them. I couldn't handle it anymore.
So now I am way over my head in debt. I have a 520 on my credit, and my husband is 560. We are trying to keep food on the table. my husband is still unemployed and on his second extension.
He has always been a smoker, and now he has picked up drinking. He isn't a drunk, by all means, but he has probably 2 24oz. beers a day. We don't have the money for him to be out spending $4-6 a day. That adds up to $120-160 a month! He also has ADHD and has a medical prescription for marijuana. He doesn't smoke around us but it is legal and prescribed to him. My biggest problem is that he spends about $60 a week on his prescription.
We are badly in debt, and he won't stop drinking or smoking and doesn't understand the amount he spends.
NOW: He is a great dad and husband other than those things. He cooks, cleans, watches the little one EVERYDAY because we cannot afford daycare. He cooks for her, gives her baths, has always changed diapers. He will have dinner ready when I get home and the house will be spotless. He works hard around the yard. He will even do anything I ask of him. If I want a snack from the kitchen, if I want a bath, he will run it. I can tell he really loves both of us and I feel like a bad person sometimes because I want to leave because of the money spending.
How can I deal with this all? What would you do? Maybe this is a plea for help. I love him, but I want him to stop drinking every night. I want him to stop with the cigarettes. He tells me: ';I don't tell you what to do!'; But I don't ever do anything. I don't get my hair done or nails done. I don't spend on anything extra. We don't have Satellite or cable. I don't even go clothes shopping. I own 3 pairs of pants, one pair 2 sizes too big. I can''t even remember the last time I bought anything for myself.
Any questions?
What should I do?I am sure a lot of people are gonna give me grief, but I need advice?Probably Very long...?
Perhaps it's time to file bankruptcy. It can't possibly do any more to your credit, it already sucks big time! Find the money for an initial consult with a lawyer, your hubby can skip his dope for a week to cover it.I am sure a lot of people are gonna give me grief, but I need advice?Probably Very long...?
wow! I don't have a solution and I don't know your beliefs, but I wanted to tell you that you will be in my prayers for sure...Good luck to you
i don't like this but your situation calls for it. file for Bankruptcy now!!!
you need a clean start. you also need to talk to your husband about his drinking and pot smoking. it is something that you guys can not afford.
good luck.
I'm gonna pray for you
You shouldn't let him go over some habits you don't like, smoking is addictive, hence- he can't just stop cold turkey and expect him to oblige in not spending. The drinking is also addictive no matter if he doesn't get very drunk.
Other than his bad habits, he seems like a great hard working and loving husband, those things should definitely overshadow his flaws, because they are more important to keep in your life. You need to just talk to him, in a loving and concerning way, tell him how you feel and how him spending worries you and makes you anxious. Talk it over and I am sure you both can come up with a solution or way to work up to a solution, don't just abondaned him over you own money anxities that don't necessarly completely involve him. Hope it works out.
Put him on a budget. Give him money for the week and let him know once it's gone, that's it. Do the same for yourself. Bills aside, you should still enjoy life. That's why you're feeling so bitter. It's because you feel like your working your butt off but with nothing but more bills to show for it. The bills will always be there. Learn how to get them paid and still have something for yourself. By no means do I mean, have a spa weekend every weekend, but doing nice things for yourself every once in a while is a must.
Also, let him know you understand he might be a bit frustrated by his current position but you're behind him and it will get better. Things will look up eventually...you just gotta hang in there.
Declare bankruptcy. It will mean you can't buy anything in credit for 5 years or so, however it will get you out of this pickle. You and your husband both need to find decent reliable well paying jobs, and start again. You will get through it
Good news! 59% is illegal because it is considered usuary!!
In most states, you don't only get the interest back you paid but sometimes you get 3x the amount they loaned you.
if you are sure you cannot get out from under one thing you can do is file bankruptcy - you can do this yourself by getting the paperwork -
the caution I have for you is that once you do it - your credit is shot for 5 to 7 years -
the good news is that all your debts go away
tough choice -
if you decide to go that route - go out and borrow all the cash you can and buy everything you can on credit BEFORE you file -
and include those debts on the filing
now that doesn't solve the problem of your husband drinking and smoking - but it solves a ';short'; term problem
as far as he's concerned - he has to be able to see the problem himself before he'll help - if doesn't he never will and you will forever have problems -
Stop paying all credit cards and loans. File for bankruptcy.
The husband smokes, you know it, let him do it. As for the beer, 2 a day is too much, talk to him and make a deal for 1 a day or 2 every other day. He's under a lot of stress too. You love him, he's good to you and all of this stress in making you not look at the big picture. Your credit score is just a number, it's not happiness. Who cares about the credit score if you're happy. Go get your nails done and stop feeling guilty. Good luck.
Don't file bankruptcy. You won't be starting a CLEAN slate. Your credit will look WORSE then it does now.
Look for a debt consolidation company OR learn to communicate with your husband about pinching pennies and working your way out of debt.
On a side note i think you two need marriage counseling.
Good luck. Work hard and stick to it.
I hate to say it, but bankruptcy sounds like a good option. You need to get him on a budget pronto!
Bankruptcy.
While it's true you are an adult etc... etc... the people who make loans are responsible for enforcing terms.
It is THEIR FAULT they loaned money to someone that cannot pay it back and a 59% interest is considered predatory and illegal in I believe 49 of the 50 states - all except Nevada. If you have paperwork about this, take it to your lawyer. They'll see settlement $$$ and might take the case on payment for pending successful outcome. They'll get all almost the money but you'll get it taken care of.
Get help getting the bankruptcy over with and give-up on your credit score and live on cash for the next seven years.
Don't give anyone a dime you don't want to; your money is yours.
They took the gamble when they made you the loan.
Loans and credit are NOT ';real money'; they are NOT cash.
They are fake, false, make-believe things those companies /invented/ to make money.
Do not harbor any guilt not paying them back. The deal is you pay it back for a good credit-score or don't for a bad one and that's IT.
You are better off ';off the grid'; anyway. It will force you to live within your means.
your life sounds very stressful, and your hubby may need cigs and beer to cope with the stress. some people cant cope well with stress; you can look down on him for that but you cant do anything about it. in fact, cigs are addictive so he cant simply give it up. it takes a lot of work to over come addictions. But, here's what you can do about it. Give yourself $20 a week to spend on yourself. You already cant pay your bills and will have to file bankrupt. Spending $80 a month isnt going to put you more in debt than you already are, and honestly its a bad idea to completely deprive yourself of everything. Depression isnt going to help your money probs, so use your $80 toward things that make you happy. Take your kid to the zoo, go see a movie with a friend, buy yourself a pair of $15 jeans from walmart, etc.
bankruptcy file around income tax time and do not give up on each other in good times and in bad times stay together no matter what and look for government assistance I don't know how you will get him to stop smoking the pot the more you nag the worse it will be I always go to garage sales or thrift stores and alot of churches give away free stuff look for food pantry's keep your chin up and pray for strength
How to deal with this or move out?
I'm past my rebellious teen stage %26amp; got along better with my mom when I graduated from HS. things have changed. She's making decisions that I don't agree w/. Such as, dating a guy that smokes marijuana %26amp; deals drugs. I have made it clear that I don't like this guy or want him smoking near our house. She says she'll tell him to quit smoking or she won't be with him, but she is STILL with him %26amp; he still smokes here. She always told me to hang around good ppl, now she is being a hypocrite. I am trying hard to find a summer job bc she expects me to buy my own food, etc. She also never cooks for me, only enough for her and her BF or they eat out. She rarely talks to me and when she does, she complains about little things. I'm always in my room or outbc I don't want to deal w/ them. Im home for summer but I can't stand her, idk if I should move out or just deal w/ it til summer ends. after this summer, im staying in the city of my school permanently. i just don't know how to deal with this.How to deal with this or move out?
Depending on how long u have left i would say just put up. Otherwise just stay with freinds or family.How to deal with this or move out?
YOu know everyone makes mistakes. If your out of HS you should be moving out on your own. Why on Earth at your age do you think she should cook for you anymore? Mercy you got some issues!
Listen son, this is a tough thing for you to hear, but your Mom is an adult and she has the right to make her own decisions. She obviously sees something in this man that you don't and you are being overly protective of her. Do you drink or do drugs ? If not, you still don't have the right to tell her what to do or expect her to live up to your expectations. I think you should go out and live on your own or with some friends if you are old enough and let her live the life she wants. Smoking pot is not the end of the world, but dealing drugs is a serious situation and can lead to lengthy jail terms ( which would end hers and his relationship , toute suite ). If you are in the US, even pot can get you 20 years or more in jail which we in Canada don't have to worry about. Is he dealing so that he can get a better price for himself as a lot of Pot smokers do that to alleviate the expense. If he is dealing other drugs like crack or meth or worse then he sounds like a real piece of S***t and maybe you should drop a dime on him but that can lead to a plethora of other problems like threats to you or your Mom or both. It's time to leave the nest little brother and let your Mom live her own life. Remember we were not put on this earth to pass judgement on others especially our parents as hard as that seems to be as you sound as you really care but ultimately you will have to let go. Good Luck and Move on !!!!!!!!
Your mom sounds like she trying to re-live her teen age years. You should love her but this isn't right. You'd be better off without her. Maybe some day she'll come back to her senses and want to work things out with you. I would move back to the city now and forget this ever happen.
You are a grown up,,, like it or not... Move out, and if you cannot afford to, then you are going to have to put up with it...Did you ever consider calling the authorities?
Most people I think consider their families dis-functional. I doubt that yours is any different.
Buy your own house and pay your own bills - then you might feel like taking a hit with them every now and then.
First thing you should do is find a time to talk to your mom without her bf. Explain to her that you are concerned about her. If her bf is caught with drugs in the house or on the property, she can lose her house. Most states seize the property of drug dealers whether they own it or are just staying there. I recently kicked a friend of 20 years out of my house. He had been living here for 3 months and he was doing and dealing drugs in my garage. You can be an accessory if you stay there with him. If she isn't willing to keep him at arms length maybe you should move out. As much as you love her, you need to let her mistakes be her own, not yours.
Depending on how long u have left i would say just put up. Otherwise just stay with freinds or family.How to deal with this or move out?
YOu know everyone makes mistakes. If your out of HS you should be moving out on your own. Why on Earth at your age do you think she should cook for you anymore? Mercy you got some issues!
Listen son, this is a tough thing for you to hear, but your Mom is an adult and she has the right to make her own decisions. She obviously sees something in this man that you don't and you are being overly protective of her. Do you drink or do drugs ? If not, you still don't have the right to tell her what to do or expect her to live up to your expectations. I think you should go out and live on your own or with some friends if you are old enough and let her live the life she wants. Smoking pot is not the end of the world, but dealing drugs is a serious situation and can lead to lengthy jail terms ( which would end hers and his relationship , toute suite ). If you are in the US, even pot can get you 20 years or more in jail which we in Canada don't have to worry about. Is he dealing so that he can get a better price for himself as a lot of Pot smokers do that to alleviate the expense. If he is dealing other drugs like crack or meth or worse then he sounds like a real piece of S***t and maybe you should drop a dime on him but that can lead to a plethora of other problems like threats to you or your Mom or both. It's time to leave the nest little brother and let your Mom live her own life. Remember we were not put on this earth to pass judgement on others especially our parents as hard as that seems to be as you sound as you really care but ultimately you will have to let go. Good Luck and Move on !!!!!!!!
Your mom sounds like she trying to re-live her teen age years. You should love her but this isn't right. You'd be better off without her. Maybe some day she'll come back to her senses and want to work things out with you. I would move back to the city now and forget this ever happen.
You are a grown up,,, like it or not... Move out, and if you cannot afford to, then you are going to have to put up with it...Did you ever consider calling the authorities?
Most people I think consider their families dis-functional. I doubt that yours is any different.
Buy your own house and pay your own bills - then you might feel like taking a hit with them every now and then.
First thing you should do is find a time to talk to your mom without her bf. Explain to her that you are concerned about her. If her bf is caught with drugs in the house or on the property, she can lose her house. Most states seize the property of drug dealers whether they own it or are just staying there. I recently kicked a friend of 20 years out of my house. He had been living here for 3 months and he was doing and dealing drugs in my garage. You can be an accessory if you stay there with him. If she isn't willing to keep him at arms length maybe you should move out. As much as you love her, you need to let her mistakes be her own, not yours.
Cooking with Kief?!?!?
My boyfriend and I were going to try cooking with the kief in our grinder. The problem is we don't know how much kief is an equivalent to how much marijuana. Would a tablespoon of kief be equivalent to an eighth?! Is there anyway of finding that out besides trial and error?Cooking with Kief?!?!?
Kief is way more concentrated so you don't need nearly as much. A teaspoon per brownie batch if it is from good weed.
Kief is way more concentrated so you don't need nearly as much. A teaspoon per brownie batch if it is from good weed.
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